I Remember

There actually was a time when I loved to write, like literally write about ANYTHING, all time favourite topic would always be about horror, thinking of different scenarios on how to kill people and how to make them suffer. Damn I was one messed up but happy kid.


Nowadays, can't say the same, been trying but it doesn't get there, I need to start again if possible. Now I just sketch how I feel or when I feel creative. Unfortunately I've been having "cravings"; I want to start back the guitar, finish the SU-27, sketch more, write more, clean up my laptop and lastly put on some fucking weight.

Okay just writting whats on my mind, I realised that actually very pessimistic. I cant seem to let myself have a nice time with life, when things are going well, I MUST FUCK IT UP. That I have realised is a habit. Really need to overcome this habit man.

I really need to sort out my life this month, August is the month of recovery for me, seeing as to I dont have Uni for a month and I'm back to work, I wont have much of a social life again so I will save money and would have more time to myself unless I start back the routine of sleep work sleep work.

Every fucking time its like that my mind saying

"Alright Navin, time to prove everyone wrong, time to make things right, time to sort up your life, time to get back on track with stuff"

and every fucking time I dont fucking prove anything because I can't seem to change my errors. Fuck I actually gave up trying to quit smoking, that is not happening man, I've fucking tried. Honestly dont make it a habit,


These are my thoughts and views. If it really offends you, either you are a pushover or just a freaking baby, grow up